from Tracey's Chair

Leave the Cell Phone at Home for a Better Relationship with Your Mate!

    I was recently having lunch with my husband at a local restaurant and we were both struck by a young married couple that was sitting at the table next to us.  They were both sitting close to each other but were completely absorbed in their cell phones, happily texting away, off in their own individual worlds.

    As a marriage and relationship counselor, I try on a daily basis to impress upon couples that the only sure way to keep their relationships happy and healthy is to stay CONNECTED!!  And, I mean to each other, not to the insidious cyber world of social media.  It doesn't have to be just social media that can isolate you and encroach on precious quality time with your partner.  It might be the seemingly educational and stimulating world of news and information.  My husband and I recently made a commitment to leave our cell phones in the car when we went out to eat or to the park to relax, because we found ourselves reading news articles or checking email instead of talking together.

    Regular quality time and deep conversation with your mate is imperative to create and maintain interest, stimulation and connection in your relationship!  One thing that can promote this kind of conversation is to read some articles of interest when you are away from each other, and then, instead of reading more while you are together, have a discussion about the things that interested you.  Ask questions and listen with genuine interest in your partner and their what they are passionate about.  You can always learn something new about your partner, even if you've been together for years.  Staying connected requires being present when you are together.  The isolation that is inevitible for electronic media addicts is poisonous this connection! 

    So, next time you go out with your partner, leave the cell phone or tablet computer behind.  It is an alluring and tempting mistress that can be just as damaging to your relationship as an affair!

Until next time,

Keep On Growing!

Tracey D. Bauer

San Antonio Marriage Counselor 

Creating More Intimacy in Your Relationship Using the Five Cs

     When I counsel couples, one of the things they frequently ask is, "What makes a good relationship?"  I answer with The Five Cs.  The Five Cs (Communication, Caring, Chemistry, Commitment & Competency) are things you can think of as the critical ingredients for a long, happy relationship. They are described further in one of my previous posts.  So, "what do you do to help improve the Five Cs?" is something many of my couples ask.  In answer, I thought I would share some of these ideas below.  The blanks in each category are for you and your mate to come up with some additional ideas of your own.  When couples make a conscious effort to attend to and nurture each of these areas of their relationship, intimacy blooms!

Communication

1. Once a day, walk up to your mate and share an intimate thought.
2. When your mate says something, immediately stop what you are doing and listen.
3. __________________________________________________________________________________
4. __________________________________________________________________________________

 

Caring

1. Once a day, do a thoughtful act that shows your mate that you really do care for them.
2. Always ask how your loved one’s day went and give a gesture of support and encouragement.
3. __________________________________________________________________________________
4. __________________________________________________________________________________

 

Chemistry 

1. Bring home a flower, card, or small surprise gift at least once a month.
2. Sneak up first in the morning and brush your teeth and put on a little cologne.  Then, come back to bed for cuddling and an intimate chat.
3. __________________________________________________________________________________
4. __________________________________________________________________________________

 

Commitment

1. Tell your mate frequently that he or she is the only person you ever want to be with/be married to.
2. If you ever have a flicker of chemistry for another person, quickly resolve that you will never do anything to fan that fleeting emotion.
3. __________________________________________________________________________________
4. __________________________________________________________________________________

 

Competency 

1. Once a day, give yourself a big compliment.  Have a smile on your face as you do this self-esteem enhancer.
2. If there is a behavior or habit that is getting in the way of living the life you want or having the relationship you desire, start working on it!
3. __________________________________________________________________________________
4. __________________________________________________________________________________

 

Until next time,  Keep on Growing!

Tracey B.

couples counseling san antonio 

5 Great Ideas to Rev Up the Romance!

 

    Are you wondering what happened to the romance in your relationship?  As a marriage and relationship counselor, one of the top complaints I hear from long-term couples is that they just don't seem to have the spark they once did.  Well, it is no secret that in order to keep a fire burning, you need to feed it and fan it and keep it alive - on purpose.  The romantic fires are no different!  Below are some ideas to help you put some lighter fluid on those precious romantic flames ...

1. Take a horse and carriage ride around your town.  Click here to view carriage rides available in downtown San Antonio. Your town will be a thousand times more lovely at night under the stars and the street lights. Visit a local bistro after. What Fun!
    
2. Stay at a local hotel for the evening.  Click here for a great San Antonio Riverwalk Experience. Get there early to set the romantic ambiance. Mood is all important; will it be sensual or carefree. Order dinner and wine in. Dim the lights, light some candles. Remember to bring the special music you've previously burned to a CD, and dance together as you look out over the city.
    
3. Create a romantic setting at home. This will take planning and attention to details. Set some time aside (if you live with your date, pick a time when he or she is running a lot of errands) to create a distinct atmosphere of sweet romance. You will want to select the perfect personalized music (pick a variety of songs that you know your date will love), meal, and lighting. Prepare the meal yourself. Cozy and romantic!
    
4. How about a rose petal bath together? This is one of the most beautiful experiences on the planet. Turn the lights down real low, have the custom-made CD ready, remember the wine or drink and relax with your love. Of all the creative Romantic Evening Ideas, this one is one of the most sensually romantic.
    
5. For an active date, visit some batting cages together. Grab some hot dogs or some hamburgers and have a little picnic on the grass. Take a moonlit walk afterwards. Believe it or not, this is one of our most memorable romantic evening ideas and will be so much fun. 

Remember, BE more romantic and you will be surprised how much more romantic you will begin to FEEL!

Until next time, Keep On Growing!

Tracey B.

couples counseling san antonio 

Happy Couples Stay Connected!

    When counseling couples, one of the first things we usually talk about is their state of connection.  Although there is no guarantee for staying together and being happy, staying connected is the best predictor.  This is something that must be done on purpose, with purpose, and with consistency.  The good news is – it’s FUN to stay connected!  Here are a few ideas to get you started ...

 

1. Take out time each day for a psychological cocktail.  A psychological cocktail is a non-alcoholic ten-minute pause when you both stop, sit down, and have close, intimate conversation.
    
2. Take a walk with your mate at least twice a week.  Use this time to relax, share, and enjoy some uninterrupted time together.  (Leave the cell phones at home!)
    
3. Call or text each other at least once during the day just to let the other person know you are thinking of them.
    
4. Pursue a hobby that you both can enjoy and relax doing together.
    
5. Spend at least two minutes in the morning holding hands and gently chatting before you jump into the day.
    
6. At least twice a week, sit down and share a news article, educational T.V. show or learning experience to encourage the discussion of stimulating ideas.
    
7. Find an entertaining T.V. show you both like and meet to watch it weekly while you snuggle and hold hands.
    
8. Before you speak to your mate, always ask yourself, is what I am about to say CARING?  If not, don’t say it until you can change it to be that way.
    
9. Kiss each other hello and goodbye – ALWAYS!!
    
10. Plan an old-fashioned date at least twice a month.  Hold hands, give passionate kisses, and BE ROMANTIC!

 

Until next time, Keep On Growing!!

- Tracey B.

couples counseling san antonio

How to Keep Your Relationship Happy, Alive & Growing!

As a marriage and relationship counselor, one of my greatest pleasures is to help couples not only work on their issues, but to have the very best relationship possible! The suggestions below will help create and keep the magic alive in your relationship!

• Once a Day – I will express sincere appreciation to my mate for something I noticed about them or something they did or said.  Regular appreciation increases the positive sentiment in your relationship and you will find yourself more likely to expect the best from each other.

 

• Once a Week – (at least) I will plan for intimate time alone with my mate.  Maintaining good chemistry is critical to happiness in a relationship.  So even if your not in the mood, once you start planning these occasions, and getting into the habit of intimacy, you will probably find yourself feeling more and more sensual every day.

 

• Once a Month – I will find a new activity or place to experience with my mate.  Frequent new experiences keep a relationship interesting and alive and prevent falling into a rut.

 

• Once a Quarter – I will plan a weekend away with my mate to rekindle and reconnect.  It is important to get away from it all once in awhile and focus on just the two of you.  This gives you a chance to just have fun together, remember all the things you love about each other, and escape the pressures of the everyday world.

 

• Once a Year – I will plan a special ritual to recommit to my mate and our relationship.  You can be as creative as you want with this.  Many couples do it on their anniversary.  My husband and I perform something called “The White Rose Ceremony” every year on our anniversary and then, a silk white rose sits in the original vase next to our picture to remind us throughout the year of our commitment to each other.

 

Enjoy!! and Keep On Growing!!

- Tracey Bauer

 

 

san antonio marriage counselor

san antonio marriage counseling

BEWARE the Four Horsemen: They Spell Doom and Destruction for Your Relationship!

Renowned marriage and relationship expert, Dr. John Gottman, found is his research that there are four communication patterns that are most predictive of death to a relationship.  He called these the “Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.”  In his book, “Why Marriages Succeed or Fail,” Gottman outlines the four destructive communication patterns that spell sure doom and destruction for a relationship.  The four horsemen are CRITICISM, DEFENSIVENESS, CONTEMPT, and STONEWALLING.

 

HORSEMAN #1 – CRITICISM

CRITICISM is an over generalized complaint that is personal and attacks your partner’s character.  Criticisms are statements involving your partner’s personality or character and result in your partner feeling attacked.  An example of a criticism is “You are always so inconsiderate and selfish!”  Criticism uses phrases like: “You never,” “You always,” “Why don’t you ever?”  Criticism naturally leads people to feel that they are being personally attacked and invites in the second horseman, defensiveness because the personal feels that they need to defend their character.

HORSEMAN #2 – DEFENSIVENESS

DEFENSIVENESS involves protecting oneself from a perceived attack and seeing oneself as the victim.  When a person gets defensive, they experience great anxiety and a flood of emotions that makes it difficult to actually tune in to the intended message of their partner.  Defensiveness can also lead to escalation, which inevitably leads to a loss of control.  Instead of listening to what is being said, the person being defensive may deny responsibility, place blame or play the victim.  Verbal examples include, “Yes, but,” “So,” “It wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t …” “That may be true, but you …” Even if you have been criticized, reacting with defensiveness prevents you from solving the problem and further impedes communication.

HORSEMAN #3 – CONTEMPT

CONTEMPT is characterized by hostile words and body language that is particularly aimed at psychologically abusing your partner.  These hostile words and body language are meant to harm your partner emotionally and attack their sense of self.  Contempt is inevitably the result of holding on to resentment and is even more destructive than criticism.  The presence of frequent contempt in a relationship is the largest predictor of relationship failure.  Contempt includes openly insulting your partner, disrespecting your partner, and tearing down their self-esteem.  Examples of contempt include name-calling, sarcasm, ridiculing (especially in front of others), and hurtful teasing.  Examples are “You are just a big, fat, slob,” “I can’t believe you are so stupid!” “There must be something seriously WRONG with you!”  Contempt also includes nonverbal communication such as “eye rolling,” and “sneering.”  Contempt hurts a person’s sense of self and inevitably creates a severe sense of negative sentiment toward your partner.

HORSEMAN #4 – STONEWALLING

STONEWALLING is withdrawing from the relationship in order to avoid conflict.  When people finally tire of the relentless, criticism, defensiveness, and contempt, they may just shut down and refuse to respond.  Examples of stonewalling are suddenly getting silent and refusing to respond during the midst of a discussion or removing oneself physically without communicating to your partner.  This is not the same as “taking a break” from a discussion in order to de-escalate.  Both partners agreeing to “take a break” and revisit the issue at a later agreed upon time is “de-escalation.”  When stonewalling becomes a predictable pattern, a relationship can be near its end and in need of immediate intervention.

 

Take Gottman’s quiz below to see if the Four Horsemen might be galloping into your relationship.

1. I feel my partner is often very critical of me. T F

2. I hate the way my partner raises an issue T F

3. Arguments often seem to come out of nowhere T F

4. Before I know it, we are in a fight. T F

5. When my partner complains I feel picked on. T F

6. I feel like my partner blames me for most issues. T F

7. I feel my partner is negative out of proportion. T F

8. I feel I have to ward off personal attacks T F

9. I often have to deny charges leveled against me. T F

10. My partner’s feelings get hurt too easily. T F

11. What goes wrong is often not my responsibility. T F

12. My partner criticizes my personality T F

13. Issues get raise in an insulting manner. T F

14. I feel basically disrespected when my partner complains. T F

15. I just want to leave the scene when complaints arise. T F

If you scored “5” or more, it is likely that one or both of you are trotting out one or more of the four horsemen (criticism, contempt, defensiveness or stonewalling) during disagreements, which prevents issues from being resolved.

More about the four horsemen including solutions for these destructive communication patterns can be found in John Gottman’s book, “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.”

Until next time,  Keep On Growing!

Tracey B.

 

san antonio marriage counselor

san antonio marriage counseling

How the 5 C's Can Create Magic or Madness in Your Marriage

 

 

    When I was a young psychology student at St. Mary's University in San Antonio, Texas, I met a man who would change the way I both looked at the world and relationships.  His name was Dr. Robert E. Lindberg. At that time, he was pretty much regarded as the local "Marriage Expert."  I met with him many times over the following years and regard him as a man of great wisdom and as a mentor.  In my practice, I incorporate his theory of "The 5 C's" to help couples on their journey to the best possible relationship. Below is an explanation and assessment that was originally included in Dr. Lindberg's Book "Marital Magic."  I invite you to take this assessment and use the knowledge you gain to reflect on the relationship you currently have as well as what it will take to have the relationship you want.  Even though Dr. Lindberg used "marriage" in this assessment, the principles are applicable to any committed relationship.

The Assessment below is from Dr. Robert E. Lindberg's "Marital Magic"

1.  COMMUNICATION

    Communication is the emotional bridge in a marriage.  It is the way couples share feelings, receive problems, express intimacy, and add mental stimulation to their lives.  Communication is multidimensional; it is the golden link between two people’s minds … and their souls … and their bodies.  Communication means sharing ideas, feelings, and loving emotions.  It is not surprising that the couples who build these bridges develop something very, very special in their marriage, and the couples who fail to establish these communication bridges often experience an emotional isolation.

    Ready for the first of your five personal assessments?  What is the level of communication that you currently have in your marriage?  Please rate it on a 1-10 scale. (1 = very low compared to other couples;  5 = average;  10 = high compared to other couples.) 

Your level of COMMUNICATION is:  __________

 

2.  CARING

    Caring is the deep concern that you have for other people.  It is the interest in their welfare, a wanting the best for them, a deep desire that they have happiness and comfort.  The classical example of caring is that of a mother for her young child.  No price is too much and no sacrifice too great if the welfare of the child is at stake.

    In a romantic relationship the caring is based, in part, on the amount of romance and love.  But in the best marriages the caring is not limited to the romance factor.  The caring remains high even as the romantic love vacillates between the normal highs and lows.  Caring is based on an emotional bonding that rises above the fluctuations of romantic love. 

    What is the level of caring that you currently have in your marriage?  Again, please use the 1 – 10 scale (1 = low caring ;  10 = high caring.)

 

Your level of CARING is:  __________

 

3.  CHEMISTRY 

    Chemistry is the romance.  It is the sexual excitement, the energy that piques the passionate desires.  Chemistry needs little defining because the odds are great that you have felt this emotion at some time in your life.  You know the difference between passion and friendship. 

    Does chemistry always fade after a couple of years of marriage?  Many people think it does, but is this a “normal” occurrence of the result of romantic neglect?  Before marriage, a couple tries to stay physically attractive, gives loving touches, remains sexually playful, and takes time to enjoy these chemistry sensations.  Then, they marry!  Now, they apparently depend on paying bills, taking care of the children, cleaning house, and watching television to stimulate the chemistry fires because that is mostly what they do before going to bed. 

    The point is this:  Chemistry is more superficial than you realize.  It is enhanced by communication and caring, but it is not created by these factors.  The behaviors and attitudes that piqued the chemistry before marriage are the very things that best pique the “energy” after marriage. 

    What is the level of chemistry you currently have in your marriage?  Again, please use the 1 – 10 scale (1 = low chemistry:  10 = high chemistry.)

 

Your level of CHEMISTRY is:  __________

 

4.  COMMITMENT 

    Commitment is based in part on the amount of communication, caring, and chemistry in a marriage.  Couples who have these three C’s find is easier to make a total commitment to a marriage while serious deficiencies in the three C’s can make any previous commitment shaky.

    But commitment also has a dimension apart from the other C’s.  Commitment often reflects a basic value system, a value system toward marriage that can range from “If I am unhappy or find someone who interests me more, I will leave” to “I am staying in this marriage no matter what.” 

    Both extremes are questionable.  Obviously, having no commitment (“I will leave the minute I am displeased”) provides little security, while the other extreme (“staying no matter what”) can quickly move from a very admirable position to sheer stupidity if there is physical abuse, a continuous series of flagrant sexual affairs, or total emotional neglect.  But the attitude, “as long as there is potential for a good relationship, I am going to try and make it work” can add a very positive dimension to the marriage.  It gives a security that encourages taking the risks needed to improve this most intimate of relationships. 

    What level of commitment is there in your marriage? (1 – no commitment;  10 = a very high commitment)

 

Your level of COMMITMENT is:  __________

 

5.  COMPETENCY 

    Competency answers the question “To what extent am I competent to be in a loving relationship at this time in my life?”  If you are struggling with excessive insecurity, depression, jealousy, possessiveness, or low self-esteem, your answer may have to be “I am not very competent.”

    Even though both people do participate daily in a marriage, it is not true that one person cannot have a major part in making it impossible for the marriage to succeed.  I have seen many cases where one partner single-handedly destroyed a marriage (despite heroic efforts on the other person’s part) because of a lack of personal competence.  If a person does not love himself or herself, it becomes very difficult for this person either to give love or accept love.

    In struggling marriages one of the key questions is “Is it me or the relationship that is the problem?”  If it is the marriage, adjust the relationship.  If it is you, first change yourself.  Become personally competent to be a very loving person. 

    Take a careful introspective look at yourself.  To what degree are you, at this moment in your life, competent to have a special marital relationship?  Please answer on our 1 -10 scale.

 

Your level of COMPETENCY is:  __________

 

    Congratulations!  Your self-assessment is the courageous first step toward having communication, caring, chemistry, commitment, and competency become major factors in your quest for a happier marriage. 

    Pause for a few moments and give this introspective process even greater depth.  Mentally review your marriage from day one to the present moment.  Become even more keenly aware of how communication … caring … chemistry … commitment … and competency have played major roles in creating your current level or marital involvement. 

Once you have assessed the current levels, you can begin working on strategies to improve the 5 C’s in your marriage/relationship.

Until next time,

Keep on growing!! 

Tracey B.

 

The Beginning

Hi All,

    My name is Tracey Bauer and I am a relationship and personal growth counselor in San Antonio, Texas. I own a private practice called The Center for Personal & Relationship Growth.

    I have decided to start this blog so that I can share and learn with more of you out there than just those that actually sit in my office.  The topics of my blogs will be about relationships and things that will help us all to grow as individuals and couples.  Sometimes we will have fun and sometimes we will be serious but always ... the goal will be to grow.  I look forward to many friends who would like to live their very best life!!

So, here is a start - our first QUOTE-TO-GROW ...

"The Best Way to Predict the Future is to Help Create It."

Find more quotes-to-grow on my website: http://www.cprgnet.com

Keep On Growing!!

Tracey B.

Together Forever - Reflections on an "Ideal" Marriage

 

      

     I believe that there are four basic requirements in practicing an “ideal” marriage.  I use the word “practice” because the term “ideal” in itself suggests a type of relationship that is consistently sought after but does not actually exist.  I believe we must be satisfied to work toward longer and more sustainable periods of “the ideal” and feel accomplished and blessed when we succeed.

     The first of the four requirements is “friendship.”  I believe that it is imperative to “like” the person we are married to in order to even have a possibility of long-term success.  A marital partner is ideally someone that we spend quality time with and enjoy being around and doing things with.  Yet, it is amazing how many couples I see in restaurants that seem off in their own little worlds as they stare blankly into space, never even making eye contact.  Friendship is what allows people to feel special and supported in life’s challenges.  When we genuinely “like” our partner, it becomes easier to have unconditional positive regard.  We more easily have exchanges that are empathetic and meaningful because we “like” being around our partner.  It may be true that opposites attract initially.  But, in the long term, I believe these numerous differences make it impossible to relate.  These opposites are not people we would choose as “friends” because we wouldn’t understand them or enjoy doing things with them.  Therefore, I believe that the first and most important step toward achieving an ideal marriage is to choose a partner that you genuinely “like,” a friend that you will be able to relate to and depend on.  You must then nurture that friendship through shared activities, communication and caring.  We need to share with our friends on a continuous basis and involve them in our lives, sharing both joys and sorrows.  Friendship in marriage gives each of the partners a “soft place to land.”  Couples who grow their friendships will have a treasure that is priceless and enduring.

    The second requirement is “chemistry.”  When I say chemistry I include physical attraction, but it encompasses much more than that initial infatuation that results in flowers and sleepless, fanciful nights.  Chemistry also refers to a long-term feeling that makes us long to be with that other person when they are not there.  We genuinely miss their little habits, their laugh, their smell, their presence.  It is a genuine attraction to all of the elements that makes that person “who they are” and is both physical and spiritual in nature.  When there is good chemistry in a relationship, it is almost tangible to others.  We have all seen those couples who seem to glow when they are around each other, even when they have been married for fifty years.  They seem to be two puzzle pieces that just naturally fit together and seek each other out.  Chemistry is very powerful and can allow a couple to weather serious storms and tragedy in their lives.  These couples know the joy of feeling a “true” physical and spiritual connection to each other.  This gives them great incentive to work hard at communicating and understanding and satisfying each other’s needs.  They want to exist in that blissful state of connection as much as possible.  Unfortunately, I don’t believe chemistry is something that can really be changed much if it is not present initially.  It is either there or it is not.  If it is not, great tragedy can result for both people in the marriage because there will ultimately be instances of both physical and emotional rejection that will increase over time.  However, if chemistry is present initially, it certainly must be fed and watered to grow and stay vibrant.  One way to make sure this connection stays strong is maintaining the “dating” mentality.  Couples must make time for each other and also make sure they are not taking each other for granted.  A good tool for this is waking up each morning and thinking of one little thing we can do to make our partner’s day a little better or easier.  Date night at least once a week will help to keep the romance burning bright. 

    A third requirement is not nearly as fun or sexy but is many times overlooked in its importance to the successful relationship.  This is the “business partnership” that is required in a marriage.  As couples live their lives as a unit rather than as singles, negotiations and goal-setting is required.  Life decisions must be faced together, finances combined and day to day operations defined and executed.  The successful couple will also have a long-term vision for where they will be long into the future.  In choosing a business partner, it is important to choose a person who is competent and committed to the success of the business.  This same premise should be applied in choosing a marital partner.  We need to choose a partner who is actually competent to be in a successful relationship, i.e. not someone who brings in relationship destroying behavior such as addiction, violence, distrust, etc.  We also need to choose someone who is committed to the success of the relationship and who won’t bail out the first time things become difficult.  Once we have chosen a worthwhile partner, it is important to define goals, finances, household activities, career moves, etc.  This can be facilitated by dedicated, sit-down meetings where the “state of the marriage” is evaluated based on the defined goals and objectives.  These habits will foster trust, security and strength in the union.

    Finally, an ideal marriage must be one that is growth-fostering for both partners.  One of the leading causes of divorce is “growing apart.”  It is naïve to believe that the person we are so enamored with on the day of our marriage will never change, or that we will never change over the next fifty years.  Therefore, it is important to accept that fact from the beginning and embrace the transformations our partners will inevitably undergo in the future.  Growing together in a relationship involves seeing “the relationship” as a living, breathing entity unto itself.  The two partners are individuals existing within that known entity.  As an individual begins to grow or overcome a challenge, they will test the limits of that relationship, the boundaries.  In successful relationships, the boundaries will expand to accommodate the change and the relationship will grow.  In unsuccessful relationships, they will break and let the individual outside.  This resiliency is perhaps the most difficult to practice because many times change can mean conflict.  Growth can be painful; hence, the well-known phrase “growing pains.”  In conflict, people tend to disconnect and move away from each other.  In order for growth to occur, a couple must recognize that disconnection does not have to mean that the relationship is over.  Disconnection, if reframed as an opportunity to evaluate and understand a partner’s new set of needs or state of being, can result in tremendous growth in the relationship.  The more disconnections that occur and result in reconnection, the larger and stronger the relationship becomes.  In order for this to occur, both partners must believe that no matter how angry they get, or how disconnected they feel, there is always a way back and they WILL work until they find it.

    I believe that the presence and nurturing of these four characteristics in a marriage can result in an “ideal” relationship that will be long-lasting and rewarding.  I also believe that their absence or neglect will definitely result in marital discourse and contribute highly to the likelihood of divorce.  However, Together Forever IS possible!!!  It is the purpose of this site to provide information and tools that will help each individual achieve the Friend - Lover - Partner relationship that will make that happen!

Keep On Growing!!

Tracey B.